Whatever the mind conceives…

You finished the saying in your head, didn’t you?  I know, it has been so overused, we often say it without understanding the powerful message behind the words: whatever the mind can conceive and believe it can achieve.

Two years ago, round about this time, I sat at home flipping through the graduation programme for the NMLS class of 2011. In awe, I read aloud the names of the merit students.

My hubby interjected, quite matter of fact, might I add, “So you gonna get merit too?”

“Sure, right after I discover world peace and the cure for AIDS?” (Insert sarcastic smile) Surely, this man must have lost his damn mind. Stueps!

“Why not?”

So, he is not joking. “Dude!” He hates when I call him that, “Do you know the kinds of people who receive merit? Rhodes Scholars receive merit. I am NOT a Rhodes Scholar, so RELAX."  

I skipped a few pages to the Principal’s Roll of Honour and read the list aloud. 

“Oh, so you need to make both lists.” It was a statement, not a question.

Hsst! I threw down the programme and flipped on the television. A few mindless episodes of a Real Housewife from any state would soon cure my annoyance.

By now EVERYBODY knows (thanks to my hubby’s FB, Twitter, Instagram, hell, he even congratulated me in the Gleaner) that I did receive a Certificate of Merit! Yes, I know... collective groan. You’re tired of having it shoved in your face, but I have good news: the point of this post isn’t so much about the merit (which is pretty awesome); it’s about the power of belief.

Don’t stop reading. I promise I am not trying to sell you a chock full of motivational mumbo jumbo. This is no law of attraction. It is the truth.

The funny thing is that sometimes it’s not your mind that will do the conceiving or even the believing, but with some great support, you’ll actually end up believing and ultimately achieving.

So, after I dismissed my husband and what were clearly his unrealistic expectations, I went about my studies in my usual way. Sure, I intended to do my best, but I had long forgotten about this talk of merit.

My husband had not. His first order of business was to create an “A Tracker”.  Now I spend a lot (a ridiculous amount, really) of time before the mirror. My favourite being the bathroom mirror, not least because it takes up a half of the wall. That’s where my husband decided to put up this A Tracker. Essentially the A Tracker is a scorecard. It’s a list of all my courses with the corresponding assignments and exam grades. Our helper received strict instructions, “Do not remove!” As if! The darn thing was written in permanent marker. It would take some serious effort to get it off the mirror.

The A Tracker! The first year tracker was way more intricate with all the stars. Alas, I have no pics as I didn't think I'd be blogging about it!

At first, I laughed at the damn thing, mostly I’d snicker at it every time I used the mirror (A Tracker my ASS, KMT). But funnily, after the first A went up, I felt like I was right back in primary and I’d just received one of those gold stars from my teacher. Yipee!  I couldn’t help but grin. Do you remember Olympic gold medallist Shelly-Ann Fraser-Pryce saying in a post-race interview that she was super motivated to win after her husband texted her to say she would break the record? Yes! It was a similar feeling.

The more As I got the more excited I became about the A Tracker. Just maybe, it wasn’t so silly after all. I can’t say that I consciously worked harder at the assignments to see an A on the mirror, but I will say that seeing those grades every single day started to make me feel as if I had a shot of achieving something great. At the end of my first year there were two Bs and four As on that mirror. Needless to say, I was really annoyed (I mean pissed) at those two Bs! 

Staring in the mirror every day had finally worked its magic. Somewhere along the way I actually started to believe that I could make the merit list. Getting an A wasn’t an elusive goal. It was right there within my reach! In the process of making the year two A Tracker, we realized that I needed straight As if I was ever going to make the merit list. There was no room for error. Talk about no pressure!

As I did my assignments and the As went up, my confidence blossomed. But, there was one course that didn’t carry a coursework grade. For all of us hoping to make the merit list this was our “make or break it” course.  From very early in the year, hubby would drop his not so subtle hints, “So you start studying for Ethics yet?” “No!” “How come all the time the only course I ever see you reading is Civil, you not reading for Ethics?” Hsst! (Flips page and ignores him.)

Did I mention that my husband can be THE MOST ANNOYING PERSON on the planet?!  

Ugh! Go away. Eventually I would take up Ethics, flip a few pages before wondering what has Nene been up to in the past few days (Yeah, I am a Real Housewives fan).

After submitting assignments that I can only surmise were a part of a grand design to unravel our sanity; assignments that had practitioners (of many years) scratching their heads in perplexity, I would go home and sulk. Later, the news would circulate that the grades were poor. My Hubby’s response? “No worry bout what dem saying man, you get A.”  One word: delusional! (OK, fine! I'll admit he was mostly right.)

Thanks to hubby, my study habits were on blast for the world to see!

Before we knew it, it was time for exams. I am not a fan of  group study, but for the first time I studied with a group and was nicknamed Hitler because of our gruelling regime. My study buddies knew I was working towards getting a merit. It wasn’t a secret and they were all supportive.

When the results were out, a friend called and told me that my name was the on the notice board for merit. I freaked.  I parked my car and sat in the parking lot repeating, “Thank You Jehovah.” When I called my husband he took the news as if I’d merely confirmed what he knew all along.

Celebrating after graduation 🙂

The point of this post is not to brag about my achievement (well, maybe a little). But in all sincerity, the objective is a greater one: sometimes, we don’t quite have confidence in our own abilities, but someone else has it for us. It may be our parents or a good friend. For me that person is my hubby. That person’s faith, belief in us is good enough until we are able to wrap our minds around it and start believing for ourselves.  

Before my husband stated so matter of factly that I should aim for a merit, I was just happy to be accepted at Norman Manley Law School. I was merely satisfied with getting one step closer to my dream of becoming an attorney. I hadn’t dared to dream of being one of two students to graduate with a merit.

Indeed, it’s not just a dream: whatever the mind can conceive and believe it can achieve.