5. 4. 3. 2. 1… fireworks, confetti, champagne, hugs and kisses abound with enthusiastic shouts of “Happy New Year!” In the midst of this whirlwind is a couple, backs turned towards each other as they force smiles and return well wishes to those around them.
Who is this couple? And, what could be so bad that they couldn’t kiss and make-up on New Year’s Eve of all nights?
Well, the couple is my hubby and I. What could be so bad? Nothing really – in truth, I can’t even remember some of the reasons we weren’t on speaking terms on the eve of each New Year but one thing is sure, if you’ve heard about the Grinch who stole Christmas, there is also one that steals New Year’s Eve – our New Year’s Eve to be exact.
For it must be a curse set upon us, why all four New Year’s Eve that we’ve have spent together, have all gone horribly awry.
2008
My stomach is full of butterflies and my heart is thumping so loudly it has become its own marching band. I’m a bag of nerves and excitement as I await my date, our first real date since we started “hanging out”. For the past 3 months I have been in Lexington training for a new job. I had to leave at such a delicate stage, at only 2 months of dating. After 3 months of numerous SIM cards, ridiculous international calling charges and lots of instant messaging, this night could make or break the future of our relationship.
Approving stares and not-so-subtle compliments as he escorts me to the car and we are off to our very first New Year’s Eve celebration. A fitting start to any girl’s New Year … new prospects, new love, new relationship.
Our first New Year's Eve date.
And then it all went wrong. As the night unfolded, one of us would remain stationary while the other wanted to dance. I was acutely aware that he was becoming more and more annoyed by the minute as I stood, feet firmly planted to the ground, thinking to myself, “No way am I getting loose in this dress! Not happening.”
We drove home in silence and there began the curse of New Year’s Eve.
2009
Hubby had a meltdown when at quarter to twelve I was still in front of the mirror perfecting the application of flawless makeup. Needless to say, he did not share my enthusiasm for the fine art of makeup artistry and by the time we got to the party, fireworks and the countdown were long over. It was so bad; there wasn’t even Red Bull left at the bar. In my mind I was on bended knees begging for forgiveness, my intuition yelling “See, I told you this bull was going to happen.” In reality, I looked on in embarrassed silence. In less than 10 minutes we were on our way home, night ruined.
[It was so bad I don’t even have a photo to show]2010
I have no recollection of what went wrong on this night save that when we finally started talking, (the next day) it was all a misunderstanding from a telephone conversation gone awry. Once again, as everyone celebrated and rang in the New Year with cheer, I bit my lips, played with my fingers and struggled to keep the tears at bay and to top it off I was coming down with the flu!
At least I attempted a smile 🙂
2011
I really had no desire to go anywhere but I did anyway. Aside from feeling like a complete drab in one of my least favourite dresses, I hated the crowd; mostly people I barely knew and cared for even less. By the time we got to the countdown, I was seething with disdain for everyone around me, mad as hell for being in a place I didn’t want to be and wallowing in self-pity because of my broken shoe heel.
You can cut the tension between us.
Quite frankly, I don’t even remember why we were mad at each other. It could have been a combination of all the above factors, but surely, it was another New Year’s Eve from hell – my hopes and dreams of a fabulous night, dashed.
Before and after - broken heel, broken dream 🙁
2012?
This will be our first New Year’s Eve as a married couple. My one humble request has been that we stay at home and celebrate as a family… alone. Whether this will break the curse, is yet to be seen!
What will you be doing on New Year’s Eve?
i would have called this the curse of the Birthdays, his and mine, someone (the non-birthday person) just always had to suck it up so the other could enjoy their Birthday. The vexations began before the birthday and was never birthday related…
I thought I was alone, in the Not Happy New Year moments. Phew!!!! Nice to know I am not an alien after all..Thanks for letting the rest of us feel normal. I am hoping to break the curse for 2013………..Let’s wait and see:-)
What happened in 2013?
Since I’ve been with my hubby, we have spent every single new year’s eve together. Now it’s the first new year’s eve married and he had to work (in another parish). It felt very strange without him but I still had a great time (at church). He came home 3 days after and I guess we celebrated “our” new year then lol. Staying at home is always a good option.
Lovely write up. Please check out my Jamaican blog below as well:
http://jablogz.com/2012/11/canada-the-land-of-cold/
Thanks
This was our first married nye. In my past marriage we stayed home every nye well, I stayed home he worked. Not once did we go out. Did we really need the money that badly??
New man new marriage ten years later and I’ve had my share of spending this holiday alone. He has to work (must history repeat itself?) and besides, the only thing planned is my kids friends parents having some people over for a house party.
The fighting started weeks before, he won’t be able to drink (he’s not much of a drinker), says I’m going to keep him out late (starts at 7, told him we would be home by 9)
Seriously. We’re married two months.
He’s scared I’m going to be attracted to one of the parents. (We’ll go into how he’s inspected all my drawers, my computer, ALL my pictures whether in hat boxes or on a laptop)
Did I mention that my kid would be at this party? And her friends??
Nye rolls around and we’re moving some things around. He’s on the floor in front of the computer cabinet and pulls a desk over, almost knocking over a six foot Xmas tree.
I’m like-wtf? And he’s just rolling on the floor like a worm on a hook. Turns out he pulled a muscle in his back. Does he want to go to a hospital? No, it seems he just wants to give me a shitty night. I order out dinner, serve him in bed, spend the rest of the day cleaning. We fight, curse, and at a quarter to midnight I’m showering off the day. Instead if a kiss we cursed each other at midnight. Oh, he was ok to go downstairs for a nicotine fix.
The next day I told him if it hurts that much, go to the hospital. Again no problem making the stairs for the nic fix, this time he even got to the store! He walked to the hospital and in the er when asked on a scale of 1-10 where is your pain? He answered at 3.
So New Year’s Day was spent in the hospital. Every ten minutes or so he would say to me, you don’t want to be here go home, or then ‘where’s my wife, my best friend’
I sat in silence and ignored him and would stand up and walk out of the room every time he’d start on me. It finally got so bad the nurse noticed and I told her I’d be in the waiting room, to call me when he was through.
He diagnosis? Pulled muscle in the back and a possible urinary tract infection.
I haven’t slept in the same bed as him since and really just want to be away from him. I know what pain is-you don’t go to a hospital on New Year’s Day unless you’re in excruciating pain. This was a shitty start to a new year and a shitty start to a marriage.
As for back pain-I know it well. I’ve been hit by a car and had severe spine surgery, fractured my spine again this year. Do I think he hurt? Yes. Do I think he blew it out of proportion to stay home? YES
His possessiveness and jealousy are starting to scare me.
@ Anon, this sounds like a horrible way to ring in the New Year! I certainly hopes the year turns out better for you. That would have made me very upset!
I think staying at home is the best plan!!! In case there is any disagreement, your bed is right there to fall into! Hehe! Seriously though, I know, it will be all fun and laughter for you guys after an amazing year!!!
Hhhmmmm. Interesting post Leece. Maybe staying home will indeed break the cycle. LOLOL!!!! What is it about New Year’s Eve that everyone ties superstitious connotations to it? After all it is just another day simply in another year. Resolutions are made vowing to do this and to do that and by mid January we are back to the same routine. I will be calling you for an update on January 1st!!!! Think about it, if you stay home and celebrate you won’t have to worry about getting dressed (and taking a year and a day to get ready), nor the party atmosphere. It will just be you and hubby in your own little world in your own little bubble. 🙂