How KFC saved Christmas Day!

Christmas is behind us and it’s on to 2014. Adieu 2013!

All you snoopy readers have been asking, what of my Christmas feast? Well, my goodly sister-in-law stepped in and volunteered to save the day. I suspect she thought I may have truly poisoned her brother. But whatever the reason, the preparation of a Christmas feast was taken off my hands.

The bad news? Well, it turned out that we didn't make the trip to his sister, and so once again it was up to the Colonel Sanders to save the day! Yes, the grand Christmas feast turned out to be a mega sized meal deal, hot wings and corn on the cobs!

How did it come to this? Unfortunately the nature of hubby's job demands that he works on Christmas Day. The plan therefore was that after work we'd mosey on over to his sister for our family dinner. Needless to say, I was only too happy to relinquish masquerading as a chef and so I quickly aborted all plans of grocery shopping for Christmas Day. After all, my sister-in-law was cooking!

Work was scheduled to end at 7 p.m. after which we’d drive over to his sister who was some 20 minutes away.  Imagine the sheer torture as the day wore on and everyone began uploading their Christmas meals. Suddenly, all my social media friends were food photographers cramming my news feed with mouth watering photos of hams, turkey, chicken, oxtail, rice and peas, cake, sorrel... the list was endless. With each ping, I secretly wished that everyone who felt the need to share their savoury spread would enter a food coma and die a quiet death. Meanwhile, I chewed on my bagel and awaited hubby's arrival so we could go to the promise land (his sister’s house).

At almost 8 p.m. when he walked into the house, the worms had completed several episodes of Kung Fu fighting, and I was moments away from passing out. I was all dressed and ready to go.

He looked haggard and tired. Not good. “Can we skip going by my sister?” Those were the first words out of his mouth after grazing my lips with a honey-I’m-home-kiss.

No, no, no! I need food! But one look at him and I knew that no matter how much I was starving it would be unreasonable to demand that we go, so reluctantly I answered,  “Yeah, I guess we can stay home if you are too tired.” Please, please, please read between the lines. 

“Yeah, I don't think I can manage that trip tonight.” And with that he was began to undress and headed straight to the shower.

Awww shucks! The worms had seemingly got wind of our conversation and by now had mounted a protest in my stomach! “We want food! We want food!” They growled.

And then the thought hit: maybe, just maybe KFC may be open on Christmas Day.

Out of sheer desperation, I went to their Facebook page and lo and behold tis’ was a miracle! The KFC just across the street was open for business. Ta-dah! Hang on worms. “Honey, I'm running to KFC, what do you want?” I had barely taken his order before I grabbed the keys and ran out the door.

Suddenly, I was overcome with guilt, shame even! KFC… on Christmas Day… seriously?!  I imagined everything moving in slow motion, and everyone staring at me, mouths agape as they shielded their eyes from the horror of witnessing the wife who dared to buy KFC for her husband's Christmas dinner. Oh, the judgment! Thankfully, my hunger got the better of me, and I brushed away the embarrassing imagery. As I pulled into the parking lot, I thought of something clever to say to the cashiers so they wouldn't think poorly of me. Like them, maybe I could pretend to have been hard at work all day. Hmmmm... Maybe I should lose the ring though. A married woman buying KFC on Christmas Day!  For sure her husband deserves to give her BUN!! (Read: cheat). So ring safely tucked away in glove compartment, I mustered up my confidence, and like a peacock I strutted into KFC.

[Insert cherubs singing!]

The place was full! Hallelujah! OK fine, maybe I’m exaggerating, but the important thing is that KFC was far from empty. I have never been happier to see a line in KFC! Booyaah! I was doing the happy jig in my head as I greeted each person like we belonged to a secret society. Yep, we were the chosen few who went to KFC on Christmas Day.  After placing and collecting my order, I proudly walked back to my car -- like a Boss! I felt like bursting into carols!

We gobbled up the food in no time, and silently thanked God for the Colonel! Indeed, "Nobody does it better!"

By the crack of dawn the next morning as hubby went off to work, I pulled up at MegaMart like I was awaiting a Black Friday sale. Yes, I did end up cooking a rather tasty feast, albeit a day late! No, there was no curry goat, thank you!

P.S. We never ended up going by his sister, but she did deliver an absolutely yummy fruitcake rivalled only by his mom's and two other very good friends who have both promised to teach me how to bake! But that's for another post!

My ham. It was good. I promise.

How was your Christmas feast?